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5 Friday Finding: The 5th Week!!

Writer's picture: Mark WarrenMark Warren

Updated: Apr 18, 2020



Welcome to week 5 of quarantine! Anyone stir-crazy yet? Don't get me wrong we all desire some alone time from time to time. Escaping big crowds and colleagues can be invigorating. However, I need a jolt of workplace competitiveness, social gatherings on the water, and basketball practice. Heck I would even embrace the annoyance of my mother-n-law shopping for gifts the twins don't need or won't use. That is sad, in the meantime here is some witticism during the distruptive state we currently face.


1. On Monday, while dressing my son for the day he says, "shits daddy, shits." WHAT? NO! (A fear comes over me that poop is everywhere when retrieving his outfit, Luckily that was not the case.) No son you do not have poops. Daddy "SHITS!" Finally, I am realizing he wants SHORTS people! Myles, you mean shorts. Yes daddy shorts!


2. Developed a new skill set that might be added to the resume.

*Capable of changing multiple diapers on a Zoom meeting and or conference call without anyone knowing. Also, I can let out any sound of flatulence and just blame it on my kids running! Who's winning now?


3. Hard to imagine how the twins will survive kindergarten without 27 snack breaks. You should see 2 handsome, gracious boys politely ask for food. Super cute! Now envision 2 enraged, growing boys demand food. Super scary! By the way, dried tangerines are my new favorite thing!


4. My kids don't cry often but here are a few things they threw a fit over this week.

  • Both wanted Polynesian sauce from Chik-Fil-A for dinner. Just the sauce

  • The dogs would not sit in the car-seats on top of them during a ride

  • Neither were able to win races up the stairs, I beat them and let them know! Safe to say, I am not letting up anytime soon. They better practice.

  • You can not learn to read by eating Books. Tried to explain that the paper might come in handy if TP becomes scarce.

  • We dropped popcorn on a walk. We also tried to pick it up by eating it like a dog off the ground. We also wouldn't let them do that. What kind of animals do you think we are? Picked it up with our hands and ate it!


5. While doing work at home, the boys spilt milk I leave my laptop for 2 seconds. Come back to find twins furiously hammering on the keyboard. In a panic I shout "Oh no, NO, what did you send?"

A 2 year old looks up and says ‘I help daddy!!’

Needless to say I chuckled and gave them hugs. There are bigger things to worry about than a garbled report or email!


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